Let me suck your...Wait! What?
By Preston Sinclair
Bella
Let me say that the only reason that I've even read Twilight is because I watched the 'Time Capsule' episode of Parks and Recreation in which a guy handcuffs himself to the radiator until they put a copy of Twilight in the Pawnee time capsule.
That said, I've never understood what all the fuss was about. I worked at Borders part time, before they went under, and everyone kept asking me where they could find a copy of Eclipse. I always had to take them to the 'Young Adult Section'. I thought to myself, what's up with that? When I was a teenager, we got to read all the same trashy novels the adults did. We never had our own section. So, I never paid much attention to Twilight, until now.
I picked up a dog eared copy of Twilight at my local library's annual book sale for 50 cents. My friends all scoffed at me. I said to myself, 'Bwahaha, I'm going to read this anyway.'
In order to put this in perspective, I think that Stephen 'King's Salem's Lot' was the scariest vampire story I've ever read. Ann Rice's 'Interview With The Vampire' was the sexiest vampire story I've ever read. Stephanie Meyer's 'Twilight'dredges up all kinds of high school melodramatic memories. Like, when my best friend walked up to me at my locker and said, 'I'm pissed at you', and stomped away in a huff as I wondered to myself, what did I do?
I picked up a copy of the Twilight dvd at one of my favorite used book stores Books and Memories in Syracuse New York.
Somehow, in the Twilight movie, Bella and Edward seem even less articulate than in the book. Their witty banter is turned into a series of sighs,furtive glances, ums and uhs. Robert Pattinson channels James Dean in Rebel Without A Cause very well however, the pan cake makeup and lipstick were totally distracting.
Kristen Stewart's Bella comes across as kind of a stoner chick, somehow not as savvy as in the book. She keeps batting her lashes like she has a bug caught in her eye.
The whole young adult genre thing makes me feel like a creepy middle aged guy for even reading Twilight. I get that it was a marketing and merchandising decision by corporate to label it as "young adult." Forget I said any of this. I wasn't here.
References:
Parks And Recreation
I picked up a dog eared copy of Twilight at my local library's annual book sale for 50 cents. My friends all scoffed at me. I said to myself, 'Bwahaha, I'm going to read this anyway.'
In order to put this in perspective, I think that Stephen 'King's Salem's Lot' was the scariest vampire story I've ever read. Ann Rice's 'Interview With The Vampire' was the sexiest vampire story I've ever read. Stephanie Meyer's 'Twilight'dredges up all kinds of high school melodramatic memories. Like, when my best friend walked up to me at my locker and said, 'I'm pissed at you', and stomped away in a huff as I wondered to myself, what did I do?
I picked up a copy of the Twilight dvd at one of my favorite used book stores Books and Memories in Syracuse New York.
Somehow, in the Twilight movie, Bella and Edward seem even less articulate than in the book. Their witty banter is turned into a series of sighs,furtive glances, ums and uhs. Robert Pattinson channels James Dean in Rebel Without A Cause very well however, the pan cake makeup and lipstick were totally distracting.
Kristen Stewart's Bella comes across as kind of a stoner chick, somehow not as savvy as in the book. She keeps batting her lashes like she has a bug caught in her eye.
The whole young adult genre thing makes me feel like a creepy middle aged guy for even reading Twilight. I get that it was a marketing and merchandising decision by corporate to label it as "young adult." Forget I said any of this. I wasn't here.
References:
Parks And Recreation
